the present
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I don’t get the big deal about parents. They’re so overrated. Really, whoever was in the mindset to think that EVERY single child needed strict 24/7 guidance was a complete fuck. Unfortunately, I have been set into the land of torture with my own parental unit.
Last night, Wee Wee and I made some very important discoveries, in addition to discussing a certain topic (a very attractive topic, if I may say so myself) for roughly three passionate hours of randy frantic deer in headlights shock. In addition to this, we realized that we will have many difficulties acquiring ourselves a husband or a boyfriend or toy of any sort because, not only are we flirts, but we’re chicken. So we draw our prey with our beauty and brains and wit and charm, and when they get close, we back off. For some deranged reason. Neither of us can fathom why, and after that, we lose most to all interest in them whatsoever. Cruel? Yes. Why? We do not know. I think this is why my “relationships” always go down the hole, because I just can’t focus enough of my attention onto one person. I wonder if we’ll ever get married (not to one another, of course…)
I was bruised and battered
I couldn’t tell what I felt
I was unrecognizable to myself
Saw my reflection in a window
I didn’t know my own face
Gonna leave me wasting away…
I’ll walk a thousand miles
Just to slit this skin
I think I need to work on that, that’s a major flaw of mine, well, along with all of my other major flaws which is like everything. I just STOP CARING! Which is ironic, what with my massive fear of being abandoned…but I guess it plays hand in hand. I fear abandonment, but once someone gets too close, I pretty much abandon myself. Serves me right. That’s the way it is, I guess.
I’m still being plagued with those thoughts that I know I shouldn’t be thinking because it wasn’t true. But try as I might, it’s futile, because it’s stuck in my mind…just wedged in the spaces between my thoughts and my dreams…I wonder…
Discover: L.I.M.P – Say it: Discover. L.I.M.P – Say it: Discover. L.I.M.P – Say it: Discover.
this time you burned me with your eyes
you see past all the lies
you take it all away
I've seen it all and it's never enough
it keeps leaving me needing you
take me away
take me away
I've got nothing left to say
just take me away
I try to make my way to you
but still I feel so lost
Takes me there everytime
Lay it all on the line
If there's a way
Build a bridge, make a path
Overlook the aftermath
Make my tears be your bath
If there's a way
Only if you'll take a ride
Go with me to the other side
Even though it's gonna crumble down
I'll keep building till you come around
Even though it's gonna fall apart,
break my heart
I'll keep building 'till i die
Build a bridge of memories
Stretch it out overseas
To the end of the world
If there's a way
Build a bridge made of pain
Send my longing down the drain
Have no reasons to complain
If there's a way
Only if you'll take a ride
Go with me to the other side
Wait... wait for me....wait... please wait for me
hhhokay. - Monday, May. 03, 2004 - 7:50 a.m.
back to the meaningless... - Friday, Apr. 30, 2004 - 10:28 a.m.
YAAAY! - Tuesday, Apr. 27, 2004 - 9:11 p.m.
NOH! - Monday, Apr. 26, 2004 - 11:03 p.m.
hallucinogenic - Sunday, Apr. 25, 2004 - 12:56 a.m.
Instead of studying for finals, what about just going to the Bahamas and catching some rays? Maybe you'll flunk, but you might have flunked anyway; that's my point.
If you ever crawl inside an old hollow log and go to sleep, and while you're in there some guys come and seal up both ends and then put it on a truck and take it to another city, boy, I don't know what to tell you.
A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call up the guy and hold the burning fuse to the phone. "Hear that?" you say. "That's dynamite, baby."
Next Thanksgiving, here is a fun trick to play: When the mashed potatoes and turkey are being served, take some of both. But hide your turkey under your mashed potatoes. When your family asks "Don't you want some turkey?," pull the turkey out from under the mashed potatoes and yell "I tricked you!!"
The memories of my family outings are still a source of strength to me. I remember we'd all pile into the car - I forget what kind it was - and drive and drive. I'm not sure where we'd go, but I think there were some trees there. The smell of something was strong in the air as we played whatever sport we played. I remember a bigger, older guy we called "Dad." We'd eat some stuff, or not, and then I think we went home. I guess some things never leave you.
Probably the worst thing about having King Kong go rampid in your town would be the huge, monster genitalia.
As the evening sky faded from a salmon color to a sort of flint gray, I thought back to the salmon I caught that morning, and how gray he was, and how I named him Flint.
I can still recall old Mister Barnslow getting out every morning and nailing a fresh load of tadpoles to the old board of his. Then he'd spin it round and round, like a wheel of fortune, and no matter where it stopped he'd yell out, "Tadpoles! Tadpoles is a winner!" We all thought he was crazy. But then we had some growing up to do.
If when you die you get a choice between pie heaven and regular heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick but if not mmmboy